Finding it hard to conceive my second child
I have a one-year-old boy and we have been trying to conceive number two for nine months. I am getting a bit worried now because it’s taking so long. We would like them to be close in age. Have you any tips on trying to conceive? We are both finding it hard to relax because of the strain of this.
Although ‘Irish Twins’ are still very common, doctors recommend that the minimum advisable amount of time between pregnancies is about one year, so you are just at that point now. Remember, your body needs time to recover after pregnancy and build back up its strength. Though mentally you may be ready for number two, physically you may not be. Nature knows best!
Try to get away for a few days with your husband and child, perhaps get some romance back in your life and try to forget about your attempts to get pregnant for a while. This may help you relax. Should you not be successful in getting pregnant by the start of spring, perhaps pay a visit to your GP/obstetrician/gynaecologist to seek advice.
But, in most cases, once people relax and forget about the issue, and spend a bit of time together, conception happens naturally.
There are some steps you can think about that can improve your conception prospects. Take a supplement of folic acid (400 micrograms per day). Stop smoking if you are a smoker and make sure you and your partner are eating a healthy diet. Avoid or cut down on your alcohol intake. All of this applies to your partner too.
You could also avoid those high risk foods not advised in pregnancy, so that you are already taking the best care of yourself once you do become pregnant.
Being overweight or underweight will make it more difficult for you to conceive. Of course, lots of overweight people do conceive without losing weight, but even dropping 10 per cent of your body weight can help. Excess weight affects hormone production, which can affect a woman’s ability to ovulate and get pregnant.
Of course, if there is an underlying issue hindering your conception attempts, it’s just as likely to be related to your partner’s fertility. He should eat and drink properly and perhaps try a vitamin supplement such as Wellman tablets.
Needless to say, you should get to know your own cycle as well as possible. Many women exhibit symptoms such as tender breasts, abdominal pain and increased libido during ovulation, so be aware of the telltale signs. You can also purchase an ovulation testing kit although be careful this doesn’t but extra pressure on you and your partner.
When pregnancy does not arrive as quickly as you hope, trying to conceive can easily become stressful and worrisome for couples.
In many ways it can be even more stressful the second time round, as you might have the expectation that you can have children easily and people may not be as empathetic or understanding of your concerns as they know that you have one child already.
But of course that does not take away from the anxiety you are feeling and having one child may even increase your hopes to have a second so that your children are close in age.
As well as maintaining a healthy lifestyle and taking plenty of exercise, it may be worth looking into complementary therapies such as acupuncture. Not only may this help with relaxation, it can actually boost your prospects of conceiving. But you should always discuss and course of treatment with your doctor first.
What you should also realise is that you are not alone. Many couples take time to have their second child but the child eventually arrives.